All of my life, as far back as I can remember, I saw God as this huge, demanding, disapproving being, whereas anything I did wrong was calculated and placed in a holding pattern for me to “work off” my penance. I was never able, in my soul, to achieve such a feat. Something like that is not possible because it was not part of God’s original design for His Children. Because of Transformation Ministries, I now know this Truth.
When I first came to Transformation Ministries, I had no idea who I was and had accepted the fact that life was just the battle to exist, nothing more. I was not aware of what life experiences had affected me or to what extent and resigned to my circumstance that my past made me who I am. I had believed in my heart that what I was experiencing was life regardless of how empty it remained. In learning my identity in Christ, the answers to all of the above questions were challenged and slowly a new perspective began to emerge. Confusion was replaced with focus, the incompleteness I felt was exchanged with wholeness of heart and the rejection so deeply ingrained in me slowly began to transform into acceptance.
I have never experienced grace as I have with Transformation Ministries, nor have I ever been challenged in such a way to know Christ and others intimately. The surface relationships that consumed my life were no match for the intimate ones that started to arise. As the intimacy gained ground, the facade of my Christian walk deteriorated and the mask I had worn for so long began to come off. I have never known the love of Christ or others until now nor have I had a love for Christ or others until now. The impact of this love will only be multiplied for generations to come.
This leg of my healing journey has not been an easy one. It has challenged me to the breaking point time and time again, pained my heart, grieved my soul and changed the course of my life in a completely different direction I never dreamed possible. The burdens I have carried have been released. Freedom has shown its door and I am walking through. The chains I had placed on my own wrists have broken and fallen to the ground. I will not look back no matter how hard it gets. I have experienced Jesus’ love and the love of others. I see no other recourse except the way of the cross. And thanks to Transformation Ministries, I have found the courage to continue to move in that direction.
– Kelley T